Zero To Hero... To Zero... To Instant Hero!

Right then, here it is.

I've been in a slump. I admit that. I got close to Hero, but recently have been slip-sliding back to Zero. I have a few more miles on the clock, a few more licks in my library. A few more strums down cold.

Now.

On the 20th August of this year, in 16 short days, I will be 40 years old.

Wait, stop clapping. I haven't finished yet.

Coincidentally, on the 20th August of this year, in 16 short days, the BBC are coming round to interview us about our art collection. For those of you who haven't been paying attention, it's part of the BBC1 documentary series "Imagine". Previous guests appearing on the show include David Hockney and Rufus Wainwright.

We're in good company, eh?

No, we're not International Collectors... well, we are, but in a small way. When we see something we really like, in whatever country, we try to find a way to buy it. We've used the Arts Council's Own Art scheme (interest free credit) a couple of times to finance British stuff. Own Art is the focus of the TV show, which is intended to show how the scheme has made art accessible to 'ordinary people' [pah!].

See, here's the thing. To demonstrate how 'ordinary' we are, the crew are going to film us going about our daily lives, doing what we do. They're obviously going to miss out the exciting stuff like podium-dancing and other nocturnal activities. Instead they want to film us at home, at the gym, riding our scooters around with their big red Loser plates. Stuff like that.

Helpful as ever, my Dearest Darling Tim made a point of insisting that as I'm a guitar nut I should play guitar for them. On camera. With sound and everything. They agreed. They're keen.

"You'll be fiiiine..." He says.

"Suuuure..." I reply.

Sixteen days and counting. Best get my Hero back on again!